Tuesday, November 19, 2019

Irregular Musings on the Unicellular Denial. #2. Nick Fuentes.

Let's continue our sporadic review of the "revisionist" flora and fauna.

So this little boy, Nick Fuentes, has been in the news lately, what with the mainstream right-wing pundit Michelle Malkin embracing this Holocaust denier (nobody could have seen that coming, nothing like that has happened before) and being shunned by some of her fellow far-right screamers.

Anyway, somebody sent this to me:
Ooh boy, where do we even start.

The cookie monster thing. You can see that little Nicky is all excited to talk about cookies, that's his intellectual level after all. It goes like this:
If I take 1 hour to cook a batch of cookies and the cookie monster has 15 ovens working 24 hours a day every day for 5 years, how long does it take the cookie monster to make 6000000 batches of cookies? 
What a clever, clever camouflage.

Anyway, let's list most things wrong with this.

1. Due to the specific illegal procedures involved it took about 1 hour to burn 4 bodies per muffle in the Auschwitz crematoria, as was documented by the Nazis themselves.

2. Obviously, no one credible claims 6 million were incinerated in crematoria; in fact, crematoria were used on a massive scale only in Auschwitz. The other concentration camps did not have to deal with such numbers, and in the pure extermination camps the bodies were incinerated outside, on pyres. Elsewhere the bodies were simply buried, graves of shootings victims are still being found.

And even in Auschwitz about half or so of the bodies were burned on pyres; so let's say, conservatively, about 600,000 bodies were cremated specifically in Auschwitz ovens.

3. There were not "15" but 46 oven muffles in Auschwitz-Birkenau. There were also 6 in the main camp but let's ignore them for simplicity's sake since most were cremated in Birkenau.

Now some simple math, assuming, once again conservatively, a 20-hour work day.
  • 20 hours * 4 corpses/hour per oven = 80 corpses per day per oven
  • 46 ovens * 80 corpses per day per oven = 3680 corpses per day
  • 600,000 corpses / 3680 corpses per day = 163 days
Which also corresponds to 1840 corpses per day in 326 days, 920 corpses per day in 652 days and so on.

In reality, with all the children who were murdered (and underrepresented numbers of adult men, who, if they were younger than 65 and deemed "healthy", were usually temporarily saved for work) the rates were much higher.

How is it that the Holocaust deniers and neo-Nazis always fail at both basic history and basic math? IQ too low?

Speaking of basic history, no the Red Cookie association never said anything about 200-300 thousand cookies either.

How is it that types like Nicky always fall for the most random and easily debunked hoax claims?

And why is it that they engage in open lies, such as Nicky claiming that no smokestacks are visible on the photos, when they obviously are...

... along with the smoke from the pyres, confirming the mass extermination (because they wouldn't need to incinerate outside given how many ovens they had - those would have dealt with the "natural" daily camp death toll in a few hours without any problem)?

And of course, given that most of the bodies were directly incinerated (with the exception of about 100,000 that were first buried but caused hygienic problems so had to be disinterred and burned in 1942) there was no problem with "underground storage".

Right after this the child engages in what comes naturally to it - fantasizing. For obviously nobody has claimed "wooden" ovens with "windows". You can almost hear the tiny gears in the child's head grinding, trying to come up with the most ridiculous thing to say next. Such as the use of cremation ovens for delousing.

Well, that's it for this little bro. It's unlikely we'll write about him again unless he shoots up his kindergarten.


  1. I took it he suddenly changed the metaphor so "cookie oven" = gas chamber, because he doesn't even know what he's denying, never having done any actual research. Unicellular indeed.

  2. Could the third article of Irregular Musings on the Unicellular Denial series be about Tales of Holohoax? It is a short (and very stupid) Holocaust- denying comics.


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